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Deep Longing

Jacob allows deeper intimacy, despite the emotional risk. Vivienne stirs emotions that Jacob is unable to repress, and the relationship careens into uncharted waters.

Denying the power of Vivienne’s submission and passion was impossible.

“Jacob’s heart sank when he thought of what he was leading Vivienne to believe. He wasn’t the right man for her, except in the playroom. Romance, dating, and relationships had not gone well for him in the past. He wasn’t cut out for sentimentality.

Although Jacob had taken precautions to keep the darkness he harbored away from Vivienne, his recent behavior might prove to be his undoing. Intimacy drew a woman closer, when what he needed was to maintain distance. She didn’t need to know about his past, or see inside him. Nor did he want her to. The fact was that Jacob was setting Vivienne up for disappointment, and the way they were going, it would be a big one.”

Jacob couldn’t blame her for envisioning a different sort of relationship than they had. After all, he had taken her on dates then shared the playroom with her, which sent conflicting messages.

Series: Rinaldi Romance

Deep Longing is the fourth book in the Bend To My Will series, a Rinaldi Romance that unfolds over a series of novellas. Jacob Rinaldi made his fortune in wine importing, and he travels the world. He is a billionaire with his choice of women, but is obsessed with having Vivienne Lake. This is a steamy romance with bdsm elements. Throughout this hot love story, Jacob faces the darkness that threatens to engulf him. And Vivienne learns the joy of submission, while teaching Jacob that love isn’t out of reach.



Jacob finally kissed Vivienne.. BUT, he is still holding himself back.. I can not wait for the next book… Need to know what happened to Jacob to keep him from giving all of himself to Vivienne… He allowed her to meet his family, that had to be a big step, but , he still holds himself back. I love this story, and the LOVE that is there between these two people is explosive regardless.. When I received this book, I sat down and read it all .. Could not put it down, and I will do the same with the next installment…. Please keep the awesome storyline coming Emily Jane Trent. Katie’s reviews

OMG!!!!! I was so excited that Jacob finally kissed Vivie!!! But more, he can’t seem to stop…he actually is enjoying kissing her. I still can’t wait to find out what has happen to him to make him hold back with her. He seemed to grow up with 2 loving parents and when Vivie meets his parents and asked his mom, she told her that he would tell her when he was ready!!!! That is killing me. Emily I am loving this story line. I can’t wait for the next installment. sheally


Chapter 1

The intimate kiss burned into Jacob like a hot iron. There was a reason he didn’t kiss. Vivienne breathed into him, with her soft lips pressed to his, searing away the last shred of restraint. She melted against Jacob, as control slipped through his fingertips.

Touched by the strength of Vivienne’s submission, he was drawn to her. Jacob failed to subdue his emotions, and in a heated moment, he kissed her. The feel of his mouth on hers was sensual and intimate, separation no longer possible.

Jacob kissed her again, swallowing up her sweetness, and relishing the tender touch of her lips. Vivienne did something to him that he could not explain, and he had let desire rule. Now he struggled to maintain balance in a sea of emotion.

Although he knew he should pull away, Jacob hesitated. Vivienne’s breath caressed his skin, her scent enveloping him. Instead of repressing the urge, he gave her another lip-bruising kiss. Such closeness was foreign, but he couldn’t deny his desire.

Indulging in the erotic kiss was a thrill Jacob had allowed. But he needed to be strong, and not get swept away in sentimentality. The dynamics of the playroom depended on his ability to stay in control, to forgo weakness, and take charge.

Could Jacob do that now that Vivienne’s lips had pressed to his? It was the reason that love and romance didn’t fit in the playroom setting. With the heart involved, he would surely fail her, and cease to push limits. Only if he was unmoved by her sexual distress, could Jacob do what was called for, even be harsh if needed?

Jacob pulled back to look into Vivienne’s emerald eyes. He should tell her that this wouldn’t work; they had crossed a line that shouldn’t have been crossed. But seeing the tenderness in her eyes, her lips swollen from passionate kissing, he didn’t share his thoughts.

Vivienne’s voice came in a whisper. “Jacob…” She ran her fingers through his hair, and Jacob grabbed her wrist to kiss her palm. “You shouldn’t have waited so long to kiss me.”

Jacob rubbed the pad of his thumb across Vivienne’s lower lip. “I’m protecting you, even if you don’t think so…or I was…protecting you.”

“Protecting me from what, Jacob? I don’t understand.”

After a moment, Jacob said, “I’m scarred.”

“Yes, I’ve seen.” Vivienne squeezed his arm. “And I wish you would tell me who did that to your back.”

“I don’t mean that.” This conversation was edging into territory Jacob would rather not enter. “I mean I’m damaged…on the inside. It’s not something you should be part of.”

Vivienne was silent.

“And romantic notions could ruin what we have in the playroom,” Jacob said. “I can’t let that happen.”

“So what now?”

Jacob pulled her into his arms and kissed her again. Vivienne was enticing, her lips too tempting. He released her and shook his head. “How do you do it?”

“You mean…care about you?”

That wasn’t what he expected Vivienne to say, and, caught off guard, Jacob didn’t respond.

“I do care about you, Jacob.”

“Just don’t expect too much from me, baby.” Resisting the urge for another kiss, Jacob slid off the bed and pulled Vivienne with him. “I’m in the mood for a shower…with you.”

Vivienne went to the master bath with him, where Jacob refocused on his more basic urges. Under the hot spray, he fondled her soft breasts and cupped her sex, arousing her. Already hard for her, Jacob lifted her, pressing her against the shower wall and fucking her hard. It felt damn good.

That night, Jacob took Vivienne to his bed. It was one more transgression, another risky move. But he couldn’t stand to see the expression that clouded Vivienne’s lovely features when he sent her to a separate room. And after the burning kisses, Jacob preferred to sleep with her close. Vivienne pressed against him, with her back to his chest, and her head under his chin. Within seconds, she was fast asleep. Jacob held her a little tighter, before closing his eyes and drifting off.


The next morning, Jacob was up early. When the sun rose, he brought Vivienne hot coffee. Setting the cup on the nightstand, he kissed her awake. She opened her eyes and gave him a sleepy smile. Draping one arm across her forehead, Vivienne said, “You’re getting pretty good at this kissing stuff.”

“You think so?” Jacob kissed her again. “I brought you some coffee.” When she sat up against the pillows, he handed her the cup.

“You’re up early.”

“I had some things to take care of.” Jacob waited while she drank some of the coffee. “It’s sunny today. I thought you’d enjoy a cruise in the harbor on my yacht.”

“You have a yacht?”

“Yes, and this is a great time of year to make use of it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that you have a yacht?”

“You didn’t ask.”

Vivienne put one hand over her eyes, then lifted it to look back at him. “What else didn’t I ask you?”

Jacob laughed. “Plenty, I’m sure.” He leaned over to kiss her forehead. Another kiss on the lips would distract him from going out, tempting him to make use of the playroom early in the day. And he had other plans. “So get dressed, beautiful. We can leave when you’re ready.”

Vivienne wasn’t long. She entered the dining room wearing white pants, a light jacket over a tank top, and deck shoes. Holding her arms out, she said, “Is this okay?”

“You look gorgeous. It’s good that you have some of your clothes here.”

“Yes, since I need to be ready for all occasions.” Vivienne walked over to him, and leaned down to give him a kiss on the lips. Jacob didn’t resist her, and put his hand on the back of her head to press her closer.

When he released her, Vivienne sighed. “Mmm, I could get used to that.”

Jacob answered playfully. “What is it, exactly, that you could get used to?”

“Morning kisses.” Vivienne sat down and began eating the yogurt with fruit. “Did you eat?”

“I ate earlier.” Jacob admired her innocent beauty, and the enthusiasm she put into everything, whether breakfast or challenging sex play. That was a unique quality. He hadn’t been with a woman like Vivienne before. Nor did he think there was any woman exactly like her. Admittedly, she was special.

When they went to the garage, Ian had the car door open, ready to escort them to the harbor. It was a brilliant June day, good weather for a cruise. In the back seat, Vivienne pressed her thigh against his. “So how big is this yacht that I didn’t ask about?”

“It’s fairly small, as far as yachts go.”

“Who cruises with you?”

“Sometimes I’m alone,” Jacob said. “Or I entertain clients.”


“You’ll be the first.”

Vivienne stared at him. “Why do I have that honor?”

“I thought you’d like it.” Jacob squeezed her hand. “Now behave, or I might change my mind.”

Vivienne giggled. It was a delightful sound, one that Jacob wanted to hear more often. The harbor wasn’t far from his penthouse. His crew was ready for them, and as soon as they boarded the captain headed the boat toward open water.

“I’ve been on a harbor cruise before,” Vivienne said, “but never privately. What route will we take?”

“I instructed the captain to cruise around Manhattan, and we’ll get up close to the Statue of Liberty.”

For a while, they sat on a cushioned seat on the upper deck, watching the shore recede in the distance. “This is really the way to see the New York skyline,” Vivienne said. “Or from a plane as you land.”

The steward served champagne with cheese and fruit. Jacob put his arm around Vivienne while they took in the view, and sipped their drinks. The sun was warm but not too hot. The breeze as the yacht traversed the water kept them cool.

They cruised under Brooklyn Bridge, which was impressive no matter how many times Jacob saw it. With Vivienne by his side, the view was even better, the day brighter. After a while, Jacob invited her downstairs to see the dining room, which also served as a bar.

There was ample seating, including a long, padded sofa, and the floor was covered with a royal-blue patterned carpet. The bar was oak with a dark marble countertop. The steward was in the main kitchen preparing the light meal Jacob had requested. He’d left the champagne in a bucket of ice.

Jacob refilled their glasses and sat on the sofa beside Vivienne. The window provided a view out to the water and the sights along the route. Jazz played in the background through the sound system. “This is luxury,” Vivienne said. “I could get used to this lifestyle.”

Although Jacob knew she was kidding, he would like to see that happen. “I hope so,” he said.

Vivienne took a sip of her champagne, and rubbed her palm over his thigh. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

She looked into Jacob’s eyes before continuing. “Did you kiss any of your other submissives?”

“No. I didn’t.”

“Only me?”

“Yes, baby. Only you.”

“But you’ve kissed before,” Vivienne said. “I’m not vain enough to think I’m the first.”

Jacob smiled. “I’ve kissed before. There was a time when I tried dating, relationships…all of it.”

“But you don’t do that now?”

“It wasn’t for me,” Jacob said. “I didn’t find it satisfying.” He paused. “Just like you didn’t.”

Vivienne gave him a wide-eyed look. “How do you know that? I didn’t tell you.”

“You didn’t have to.” Jacob stroked his fingertips along her jaw. “What’s more important is…do you find what we do satisfying?”

“I don’t think it’s any secret how I feel about…you…and what we do.” Vivienne’s eyes gleamed. “I don’t hide my feelings.”

“It’s one of your most endearing qualities.”

Vivienne tilted her head and gave him a teasing look. “I’m endearing?”

“Yes, you are,” Jacob said. “In fact, I’m beginning to find you irresistible.” He took her glass and put it on the table beside his. Then he pulled Vivienne next to him, wrapping one arm around her.

Their gazes locked, and Jacob’s cock throbbed. “I want to see that flush in your cheeks, baby…how beautiful you look in the throes of orgasm.” He kissed her neck, her jaw, and then her lips. Vivienne sighed into the kiss.

Jacob undid her pants, and she lifted up, allowing him to slide them down to her knees. He stroked between her legs, not surprised to find her wet. With his mouth covering hers, Jacob breathed her in, and dipped two fingers inside her.

Vivienne whimpered, and kissed back with fervor. She writhed against his touch, begging for release. Jacob fingered her pussy, teasing her clit, while his tongue slashed wildly against hers. Pre-cum seeped out, wetting his pants, and he nearly came before she did.

Panting softly, and making sexy sounds in the back of her throat, Vivienne came in his arms. When she shuddered against him, Jacob swallowed her cries, holding his fingers over her clit. Gasping for breath, Vivienne pulled back.

She closed her eyes for a moment, as if coming back to herself. Then Vivienne undid Jacob’s top button and zipper, pulling his swollen cock free. She lowered her mouth over him, sucking ruthlessly. When he moaned and his cock spurted, Vivienne sucked harder.

Jacob dug his hands in Vivienne’s hair. “Jesus,” he groaned, and then exploded in her mouth. When he was drained, Vivienne rested her cheek on his thigh and put her palm on his chest. It was an expressive gesture, and did not go unnoticed.

After they caught their breath and re-dressed, Vivienne sat on his lap with her arms around his neck. In a low voice, she said, “I’m enjoying your yacht, quite a lot.”

Until Vivienne, there had been no emotional side to Jacob’s sexual release. Right then, he didn’t understand his feelings, or how to deal with what was happening. If he even knew what was happening. “And I’m enjoying kissing you,” he said, then gazed into the depths of her eyes. “What are you doing to me, Vivienne?”

“Only good things, I hope.” Vivienne leaned back with her hands on his shoulders.

Jacob wanted her close, needed to be near her. Yet with any other woman it hadn’t been that way. He didn’t intend to deprive himself. Vivienne’s lips felt too good against his, her tongue too hot inside his mouth. He craved her breath mingled with his.

“Yesterday, I would have said bad…but your kisses are too good.” Jacob kissed her fingertips. “Now that I’ve tasted your sweet kisses, I have no intention of giving them up.”

Vivienne touched his cheek.

“But don’t think this means I’ll go easy on you in the playroom.”

In a throaty voice, Vivienne replied, “No…I wouldn’t expect you to.”

Jacob questioned his decision to take a cruise, wishing he could order Vivienne to the playroom that instant. The promise of dominating her sent heat to his loins. The memory of her submission from the night before made Jacob hard, and he looked forward to the evening to come. Once again behind the playroom door, he would have Vivienne’s submission and restore balance to the relationship, which was unexpectedly careening into uncharted waters.